Mitch: Rosie! Wake up!
Rosie: (starts) What!? Have they come for our guns?!
Mitch: No one is coming for our guns.
Rosie: Yet.
Mitch: Would you please stop reading World Net Daily?
Rosie: That’s unvarnished truth, my friend.
Mitch: This is important. I’ve been working on my Esperanto, and I want–
Rosie: Wait! Stop! You’ve been doing what?
Mitch: I’m studying Esperanto. Since I conduct wedding services as a sideline, I thought some couple, some day, might want to have their service in Esperanto.
Rosie: When Lesbians marry on the town square in Selma, I’ll believe that someone, somewhere, will want their wedding service in Esperanto.
Mitch: See? There could be an opening for me.
Rosie: For your great-great grandchild, maybe. But really, Esperanto?
Mitch: Listen, according to Wikipedia–
Rosie: (sigh)
Mitch: Esperanto is “the working language of several non-profit international organizations, such as Sennacieca Asocio Tutmonda, a left-wing cultural association–
Rosie: Left-wing? No kidding.
Mitch: And the World Esperanto Association has “an official consultative relationship with the United Nations and UNESCO.”
Rosie: Wow, that’s a shocker. Imagine, a left-wing language association having links to the UN.
Mitch: Well anyway, I’m working on my conversational Esperanto. Here’s how you order a beer.
Rosie: Of course that’s the first thing you’d learn.
Mitch: Unu bieron, mi petas.
Rosie:(thinking) ‘ Unu moron,’ is more like it.
Mitch: Mia nomo estas Mitcho. That means, ‘My name–
Rosie: I know what it means!
Mitch: You do? Oh, no…don’t tell me–
Rosie: Yes.
Mitch: Since when?
Rosie: Since 2003. My previous owner was a left-leaning college professor–if you’ll pardon the redundancy.
Mitch: And he taught you–
Rosie: SHE taught me, you sexist oaf. I’m fluent in Esperanto, as well as 14 other languages, including one, from the Amazon Basin, that consists entirely of clicks, grunts and glottal stops.
Mitch: That’s…that’s just great. I’m happy for you.
Rosie: Ne dankinde.
Mitch: I need a bieron.
Rosie: Click, click!
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